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| Dubenko. |
Ladies and gentlemen, this is Dubenko. He is my arch nemesis. Every month, we meet on the field of battle. I bring a borrowed set of 10 golden rings, and he brings 100 horsepower of pure, unadulterated turtle prowess.
I hate Dubenko.
I cannot complete all of the Darkmoon dailies in one go. But the Ring Toss, I thought, was a solid bet. I mean, Dubenko doesn't ever even go farther than the radius of the green target ring. Of course, due to torture game mechanics, even if Dubenko is at the center of your target ring it's possible your ring will land just to his left. So it goes.
But the real problem is that Dubenko lures you into a false sense of security. How hard could it be to toss a ring on the back of an ostensibly slow-moving turtle? The snarky Jessica Rogers assures us it's a "simple game." It's not. Dubenko can remain unmoving for minutes, enticing players to toss all of their rings in one frantic button mash. Then, just as the rings are approaching his spike, he spurs into action! Like a rocket, he waddles back and forth between his three stopping points, dodging each and every one of your attempts.
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| I don't like it, and I'd really rather not put a ring on it. |
Dubenko is greased lightning, wrapped in stiff gray leather, covered in a glossy shell, wrapped in an enigma. He has no greater pleasure than to torment me for 7 days out of every month, pretending to lounge and rest before zipping away from my rings. But I can't remain patient forever. One day I'll snap. Akabeko is a max-level chef, and she has a hankering for turtle soup.
Thanks for making me spit coffee all over my monitor ^_^
ReplyDeleteI hate him too. Let's band together and unite the Horde and the Alliance against this hated turtle.
ReplyDeleteI can do the cannon one no problems, although now I've actually said I'm probably going to fail horribly tomorrow. Ditto beating up Hogger but this one.. sometimes it looks like it should have hit perfectly and he just saunters off smirking.. grrr.
Maybe I'm weird but this is my favourite mini-game, the only one that I'm sure I can finish in one go. It usually takes me two tokens for each mini-games, except this one. Maybe the turtle just likes me.
ReplyDelete@Aralosseien: Mission accomplished!!
ReplyDelete@Erinys: I'm so jealous of your cannon ability!! I can get 3/5 mooost of the time but sometimes I'll like...land on the dock and nearly kill myself. It's not good.
@Lyrestra: Dang! I used to be able to do this quest no problem, but lately I am missing pretty badly. One time I got one hit out of 10 tries. MORTIFYING!
Hahaha THE TURTLE, HE MOCKS YOU, SHELLED LIGHTNING
ReplyDeleteThat last picture genuinely made me laugh. :D
So very, hopelessly true. Every time I think, "I'VE GOT YOU NOW YOU GIT," he dodges with the speed of a half cheetah, half border collie wonder.
ReplyDeleteWhat makes it EVEN BETTER is that person who runs up and starts after you did ... and finishes in like three shots. Favouritism. That's what that is.
@Rades: Yessss I am victorious!
ReplyDelete@imageheavy: I especially hate it when I confuse the other people's rings for my own and I'm like WAIT WHY NO CREDIT?? Awwww :(:( Also lmao @half cheetah, border collie
I was suspicious but now I'm sure, those carnies have put in a ringer. This used to be my one sure, one ticket game. All of a sudden it's a sure two ticket game. I think they switched him with his Mage cousin Dublinko!
ReplyDeleteLol Dublinko I love it!! Those turtles are really asking for it *_*
DeleteLMAO Akachan! You know, I do feel rather ashamed when I can't do ring toss in one go as well... but not enough to make turtle soup :P I usually like the turtle the best.. it's the BLASTENHEIMIER I HATE
ReplyDeleteUgh! Sometimes even if I release the wings like I always do, I end up waaaaaay off the bullseye mark. And then you have to get all the way back to the cannon and just UGH
DeleteI tend to aim between his head and the spike - that seems to work!
ReplyDeleteOn the cannon, DBM is your friend with a countdown from 5. Bullseye most of the time, lag permitting.
For the Shooting gallery, start to shoot just before the target arrow is about to pop, and you can swivel to the correct target most of the time and get a Quick Shot in. It's very satisfying to get this one done with one token.
on Whack-a-mole again DBM is your friend, as it lets you know when a 'Hogger' spawns. Pure RNG though. If you don't get enough Hoggers, you can't do it in one token.
Tonks: keep mashing the fire button, as you seem to hit invisible targets doing that.
Yanno, DBM has been really helpful to me with whackagnoll, but for the cannon I usually end up landing just after the dock - sometimes I even hit the dock! I have lag issues though ^^;;
DeleteI never thought about the shooting gallery, but now that you mention it it makes sense! Since it has a cast time there should be time to swivel. Thanks!!
I'm getting better at tonks - I don't run away and miss out on targets when *I* get targeted now, so I can finish in one round almost always XD